Video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q2_Kv51OYCA
Fact: Australia have selected 9 different spinners since Shane Warne retired in 2007 (Stuart MacGill, Brad Hogg, Beau Casson, Cameron White, Jason Krejza, Nathan Hauritz, Bryce McGain, Steve Smith and Xavier Doherty).
What a difference a week makes! Fourteen days ago England had just completed an emphatic victory in the 2nd Test by an innings and 71 runs. Australia were left in utter disarray: an under-pressure captain, a selection panel disconnected to the point of autism, and a bowling attack less promising than the house wine at a suburban Indian restaurant. However, Australia have recently squared the series 1-1 after a resounding 276 run triumph at Perth. So what can explain such a reversal in power?
Ijaz Butt has promptly accused the England team of not only fixing the 3rd Test, but also the bombing of Darwin in 1942. However, until such claims have been confirmed, I will plough on with my own ‘conspiracy theory’.
England were far too complacent. It was clear to all that the tour match against Victoria at the MCG was handled in a jocular and cavalier manner. Indeed, the decision to bowl Strauss and Morgan in the second innings clearly epitomised the limited value England placed on the fixture. Those ‘fortunate’ enough not to be selected, were either rehearsing their Sports Personality of the Year acceptance speech or attempting to break the land-speed record in a Lamborghini.
Australia’s preparation for the 3rd Test was perfect! The emphasis was placed on hostility and revenge; the Australia of old! Mitchell Johnson encapsulated this regained philosophy. Despite returning career-worst figures of 0-170 in Brisbane, the ‘Jockey’ underwear model was still prepared to display his manhood in the build-up to the 3rd Test; claiming that the ‘Poms’ should expect fast and aggressive bowling. Within two days Johnson had 62 and 6-38 next to his name.
However, despite the Old Enemy’s renaissance and the endeavours of the MCG grounds-men to produce a pitch greener than the Garden of Eden, England still remain close favourites to retain the Ashes. For Australia’s batting line-up is crippled by fragility: Such is the enduring vulnerability of Philip Hughes; even Geoffrey Boycott’s grandmother (bowling up the hill and into a strong wind) could dismiss him. Though Shane Watson appears to be in fine fettle, his inability to convert half centuries into three figure scores (fourteen fifties but only two tons) continues to frustrate the Aussie effort. In addition to this, Michael Clarke has never looked so out of touch.
This being said, Michael Hussey is enjoying an epic return to form (517 runs in six innings), and Ricky Ponting will surely not play through a five match series without securing at least one ton.
England’s batsmen, with the exception of Paul Collingwood, have all found good form on tour and have nothing to worry about so long as they exercise some thought and discipline in their innings. For instance, I honestly don’t believe there is a more worrying sight in English cricket than Alastair Cook launching onto the front foot. Maybe Monty Panesar in the slips? Or Amjad Khan taking the new ball?
Very little separates the two bowling attacks, as I fear Swann may have to wait until Sydney before he can truly influence the series.
Absolute Jaffa’s prediction: England to win; Paul Collingwood and Ricky Ponting to score 100s.
Merry Christmas
Wednesday, 22 December 2010
Monday, 22 November 2010
One For The Slip Cordon
Video (from 7:40 onwards): http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1EIwhljK2PA
Fact: The highest individual score in an Ashes test match, Sir Leonard Hutton 364 (The Oval, 20/08/1938).
Ashes Countdown: 2 days!!!!!!
Tom’s wife is rushed to hospital to give birth to a son. But as he is far too nervous for such an ordeal, he decides not to accompany his wife, and instead head down to the pub for a few ales. The more nervous Tom gets the more pints he drains. But as a truly devoted husband, he regularly phones the hospital for updates.
On one such occasion, Tom phones the doctor asking for the latest. The flustered doctor replies, “I’m really sorry Tom, but there appears to be a few unexpected complications, I will phone you the moment anything develops”.
This of course did nothing to ease Tom’s nerves. So more and more pints were drained.
The apprehension proved too much for Tom, and so he called again. But such was his intoxicated state; Tom accidentally phoned the local cricket ground and not the hospital. Fearing the worst, Tom ventured “So, what’s the latest?” A sombre voice returned: “Not good at all mate. All 10 are out, and the last 2 were ducks!”
PLEASE comment with your favourite cricket joke.
Fact: The highest individual score in an Ashes test match, Sir Leonard Hutton 364 (The Oval, 20/08/1938).
Ashes Countdown: 2 days!!!!!!
Tom’s wife is rushed to hospital to give birth to a son. But as he is far too nervous for such an ordeal, he decides not to accompany his wife, and instead head down to the pub for a few ales. The more nervous Tom gets the more pints he drains. But as a truly devoted husband, he regularly phones the hospital for updates.
On one such occasion, Tom phones the doctor asking for the latest. The flustered doctor replies, “I’m really sorry Tom, but there appears to be a few unexpected complications, I will phone you the moment anything develops”.
This of course did nothing to ease Tom’s nerves. So more and more pints were drained.
The apprehension proved too much for Tom, and so he called again. But such was his intoxicated state; Tom accidentally phoned the local cricket ground and not the hospital. Fearing the worst, Tom ventured “So, what’s the latest?” A sombre voice returned: “Not good at all mate. All 10 are out, and the last 2 were ducks!”
PLEASE comment with your favourite cricket joke.
Thursday, 4 November 2010
Top Five Ashes Moments
Ashes video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a_IV5i61HAE
Ashes fact: England have only retained the Ashes once (1972).
With only 20 days until the Ashes begins, the country (if not the entire universe) should be gripped with raw enthusiasm. It must be the topic of debate everywhere: the barber’s chair, the ‘Klute’* toilets or in the pub. To add to this immense excitement, ‘Absolute Jaffa’ is pleased to produce its favourite Ashes moments of all-time. Enjoy!
‘That Test’, Headingly 1981
Undoubtedly the greatest test match of all-time. On the morning of the 4th day England were 6-1 having been asked to follow-on, still 221 runs behind Australia. Such was the unlikelihood of an English victory; Ladbrokes allocated odds of 500-1 in favour of the impossible. Dennis Lillee and Rod Marsh both had small bets! As the day grew on, so did England’s shame; 135-7 (92 runs behind) England were surely dead and buried. But a swash-buckling 149* from Botham followed by a fiery 8-43 from Willis, meant England recorded a heroic 18 run triumph. Only the second time in the history of test cricket whereby the side following on has achieved a victory.
‘The Duck of Destiny’; The Oval 1948
In his final test innings, Donald Bradman only required four more runs to secure an average of one hundred. Yet The Don was dismissed for a second-ball duck by the arm of Eric Hollies, tossing up a perfectly pitched googly. A distraught Bradman (only averaging 99.94) reflected afterwards: “It’s not easy to bat with tears in your eyes”. Excuses, excuses!
‘The Ball of the Century’; Old Trafford 1993
Shane Warne’s first ball in an Ashes test match. The casual waltz up to the wicket. The poetic drift towards the leg-side. The playful rip from the turf. The gentle clip upon the off-stump. And the stunned fat man (Gatting).
‘The Handshake’; Edgbaston 2005
After one of the most epic test matches in the history of the Ashes, it was truly refreshing to picture Andrew Flintoff consoling the crest-fallen Brett Lee. Perhaps no one will ever learn the true words spoken on that occasion. But Freddie often jokes that he told Lee: “It’s 1-1, you Aussie bastard!”
‘The Drunkard!’; Sydney 1894
The first occasion in the history of test cricket whereby the side following on has achieved a victory. At the end of the 5th day Australia stood at 113-2, needing just a further 64 runs to win. With the test match effectively ‘over’, many of the England players enjoyed a heavy night drinking. Among them was of course Bobby Peel, a slow-left arm spinner. However, not that the highly intoxicated Englishman would have noticed, the weather that night conspired to produce what can only be described as a ‘mine-field’ of a wicket. Thus, the England captain Andrew Stoddart threw Peel under a cold-shower before sending him out to open the bowling. Returning figures of 6-67, Peel led England to a remarkable 10 run victory. If Carlsberg made bowlers......
So there we have it. Please feel free to post your favourite Ashes moments. Cheers.
*’Klute’ is a popular student nightclub in Durham. Voted the worst nightclub in Europe. Fact!
Ashes fact: England have only retained the Ashes once (1972).
With only 20 days until the Ashes begins, the country (if not the entire universe) should be gripped with raw enthusiasm. It must be the topic of debate everywhere: the barber’s chair, the ‘Klute’* toilets or in the pub. To add to this immense excitement, ‘Absolute Jaffa’ is pleased to produce its favourite Ashes moments of all-time. Enjoy!
‘That Test’, Headingly 1981
Undoubtedly the greatest test match of all-time. On the morning of the 4th day England were 6-1 having been asked to follow-on, still 221 runs behind Australia. Such was the unlikelihood of an English victory; Ladbrokes allocated odds of 500-1 in favour of the impossible. Dennis Lillee and Rod Marsh both had small bets! As the day grew on, so did England’s shame; 135-7 (92 runs behind) England were surely dead and buried. But a swash-buckling 149* from Botham followed by a fiery 8-43 from Willis, meant England recorded a heroic 18 run triumph. Only the second time in the history of test cricket whereby the side following on has achieved a victory.
‘The Duck of Destiny’; The Oval 1948
In his final test innings, Donald Bradman only required four more runs to secure an average of one hundred. Yet The Don was dismissed for a second-ball duck by the arm of Eric Hollies, tossing up a perfectly pitched googly. A distraught Bradman (only averaging 99.94) reflected afterwards: “It’s not easy to bat with tears in your eyes”. Excuses, excuses!
‘The Ball of the Century’; Old Trafford 1993
Shane Warne’s first ball in an Ashes test match. The casual waltz up to the wicket. The poetic drift towards the leg-side. The playful rip from the turf. The gentle clip upon the off-stump. And the stunned fat man (Gatting).
‘The Handshake’; Edgbaston 2005
After one of the most epic test matches in the history of the Ashes, it was truly refreshing to picture Andrew Flintoff consoling the crest-fallen Brett Lee. Perhaps no one will ever learn the true words spoken on that occasion. But Freddie often jokes that he told Lee: “It’s 1-1, you Aussie bastard!”
‘The Drunkard!’; Sydney 1894
The first occasion in the history of test cricket whereby the side following on has achieved a victory. At the end of the 5th day Australia stood at 113-2, needing just a further 64 runs to win. With the test match effectively ‘over’, many of the England players enjoyed a heavy night drinking. Among them was of course Bobby Peel, a slow-left arm spinner. However, not that the highly intoxicated Englishman would have noticed, the weather that night conspired to produce what can only be described as a ‘mine-field’ of a wicket. Thus, the England captain Andrew Stoddart threw Peel under a cold-shower before sending him out to open the bowling. Returning figures of 6-67, Peel led England to a remarkable 10 run victory. If Carlsberg made bowlers......
So there we have it. Please feel free to post your favourite Ashes moments. Cheers.
*’Klute’ is a popular student nightclub in Durham. Voted the worst nightclub in Europe. Fact!
Saturday, 16 October 2010
SOBERS FOR KALLIS
Video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jrp53wKHgb0
Fact: Sachin Tendulkar has ‘gifted’ nine bowlers their maiden test match wickets. The highest in history.
In the words of Brian May upon deciding to collaborate with the British pop group ‘Five’… … “I’VE MADE A TERRIBLE MISTAKE!” In this instance the ‘gaffe’ is not the recording of a hideous rendition of ‘We Will Rock You’, but the selection of Jacques Kallis over Sir Garfield Sobers.
Initially, the intent was to produce a rock-solid middle order to compliment the attacking instincts of Virender Sehwag and Sir Viv Richards. However, a thorough examination of Sobers’ career reveals just how much of a fool I have been! The great West Indian is without doubt the finest all-rounder in the history of the sport.
Not only did he amass 26 centuries in 63 innings (as his first ton only arrived in his 29th Test innings: 365*!), but 11 of them were scores in excess of 150. As the decline of genuine Test all-rounders continues, it is refreshing to remember a cricketer averaging 57 with the bat whilst registering 235 wickets with three different bowling actions: slow left arm spin, wrist spin and fast-medium. We will never see the like again.
Absolute Jaffa’s All-Time World XI now is as follows:
1. Sir Leonard Hutton (c)
2. Virender Sehwag
3. Donald Bradman
4. Sachin Tendulkar
5. Sir Garry Sobers
6. Sir Viv Richards
7. Alan Knott (wk)
8. Wasim Akram
9. Shane Warne
10. Malcolm Marshall
11. Michael Holding
So there we have it. I have recognised my mistake, and thus remedied it. Now if only Geoff Miller could exercise such humility; he would cancel Chris Tremlett’s flight to Australia. Better still; confiscate his passport so he will never represent England on an overseas tour ever again!
Reasons for notable exclusions:
Sunil Gavaskar: No doubt a marvellous batsman with an exceptional defence. But his hostile and confrontational character will always foster a negative impact on his partner. During a Test in Melbourne 1981 ‘Sunny’ (one of the most ironic names in cricket) believed he was wrongfully dismissed lbw, and thus staged a protest by selfishly forcing his partner, Chetan Chauhan, off the square as well.
Brian Lara: Vulnerable to short bowling. Not a team player.
Kumar Sangakkara: It is clear that Kumar fails to possess the glove skills of Knott. Furthermore, when ‘Sanga’ plays as the designated wicket-keeper he only averages 40. Compare that to an average of 76 when not behind the stumps.
Adam Gilchrist: Never renowned for his keeping. His destructive counter-attacking, whilst one of the best in the game, will never eclipse the heroics set by Viv Richards.
Chris Tremlett: He is not good.
The Bowling Department: Many have chastised ‘Absolute Jaffa’ for overlooking both Muttiah Muralitharan and Glenn McGrath. There is probably a further half a dozen bowlers who deserve inclusion in an all-time world XI. But, of course only a few can be selected.
Cheers for reading.
Fact: Sachin Tendulkar has ‘gifted’ nine bowlers their maiden test match wickets. The highest in history.
In the words of Brian May upon deciding to collaborate with the British pop group ‘Five’… … “I’VE MADE A TERRIBLE MISTAKE!” In this instance the ‘gaffe’ is not the recording of a hideous rendition of ‘We Will Rock You’, but the selection of Jacques Kallis over Sir Garfield Sobers.
Initially, the intent was to produce a rock-solid middle order to compliment the attacking instincts of Virender Sehwag and Sir Viv Richards. However, a thorough examination of Sobers’ career reveals just how much of a fool I have been! The great West Indian is without doubt the finest all-rounder in the history of the sport.
Not only did he amass 26 centuries in 63 innings (as his first ton only arrived in his 29th Test innings: 365*!), but 11 of them were scores in excess of 150. As the decline of genuine Test all-rounders continues, it is refreshing to remember a cricketer averaging 57 with the bat whilst registering 235 wickets with three different bowling actions: slow left arm spin, wrist spin and fast-medium. We will never see the like again.
Absolute Jaffa’s All-Time World XI now is as follows:
1. Sir Leonard Hutton (c)
2. Virender Sehwag
3. Donald Bradman
4. Sachin Tendulkar
5. Sir Garry Sobers
6. Sir Viv Richards
7. Alan Knott (wk)
8. Wasim Akram
9. Shane Warne
10. Malcolm Marshall
11. Michael Holding
So there we have it. I have recognised my mistake, and thus remedied it. Now if only Geoff Miller could exercise such humility; he would cancel Chris Tremlett’s flight to Australia. Better still; confiscate his passport so he will never represent England on an overseas tour ever again!
Reasons for notable exclusions:
Sunil Gavaskar: No doubt a marvellous batsman with an exceptional defence. But his hostile and confrontational character will always foster a negative impact on his partner. During a Test in Melbourne 1981 ‘Sunny’ (one of the most ironic names in cricket) believed he was wrongfully dismissed lbw, and thus staged a protest by selfishly forcing his partner, Chetan Chauhan, off the square as well.
Brian Lara: Vulnerable to short bowling. Not a team player.
Kumar Sangakkara: It is clear that Kumar fails to possess the glove skills of Knott. Furthermore, when ‘Sanga’ plays as the designated wicket-keeper he only averages 40. Compare that to an average of 76 when not behind the stumps.
Adam Gilchrist: Never renowned for his keeping. His destructive counter-attacking, whilst one of the best in the game, will never eclipse the heroics set by Viv Richards.
Chris Tremlett: He is not good.
The Bowling Department: Many have chastised ‘Absolute Jaffa’ for overlooking both Muttiah Muralitharan and Glenn McGrath. There is probably a further half a dozen bowlers who deserve inclusion in an all-time world XI. But, of course only a few can be selected.
Cheers for reading.
Monday, 11 October 2010
Absolute Jaffa's All-Time World XI
Video (tweaker!): http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DUwpJ7wRCFI&feature=related
Fact: Sir Donald Bradman was the first professional sportsman to bring a ‘WAG’ on tour
Over the last sixteen months the Cricinfo staff has selected an all-time XI for each of the eight top test nations. There have of course been some naive decisions. Indeed, divorcing the great opening partnership of Greenidge and Haynes was met with an outbreak of rebellion on the streets of Bridgetown. Undoubtedly the most damaging insult to West Indies cricket since Ravi Rampaul was given the new-ball.
Now Cricinfo is set to reveal an all-time World XI (October 18th). One can hardly contain their excitement! So much so that ‘Absolute Jaffa’ is proud to present its all-time World XI!
1. Sir Leonard Hutton (c)
2. Virender Sehwag
3. Sir Donald Bradman
4. Sachin Tendulkar
5. Jacques Kallis
6. Sir Viv Richards
7. Alan Knott
8. Wasim Akram
9. Shane Warne
10. Malcolm Marshall
11. Michael Holding
So there we have it: An opening partnership combining the technical beauty of Hutton and the attacking instinct of Sehwag. A middle-order of disciplined run machines. An aggressive, egotistical and fearless bludgeoner in Richards. The most skilful glove-man in the game’s history. A lefty who moved the ball with such destructive brilliance. Wit, nous, intelligence and pure talent embodied within Warne’s ‘tweakers’. And two tame West Indians floating up 70mph half-volleys!
Anyone disagree? Please post your thoughts and comments and I will respond.
Fact: Sir Donald Bradman was the first professional sportsman to bring a ‘WAG’ on tour
Over the last sixteen months the Cricinfo staff has selected an all-time XI for each of the eight top test nations. There have of course been some naive decisions. Indeed, divorcing the great opening partnership of Greenidge and Haynes was met with an outbreak of rebellion on the streets of Bridgetown. Undoubtedly the most damaging insult to West Indies cricket since Ravi Rampaul was given the new-ball.
Now Cricinfo is set to reveal an all-time World XI (October 18th). One can hardly contain their excitement! So much so that ‘Absolute Jaffa’ is proud to present its all-time World XI!
1. Sir Leonard Hutton (c)
2. Virender Sehwag
3. Sir Donald Bradman
4. Sachin Tendulkar
5. Jacques Kallis
6. Sir Viv Richards
7. Alan Knott
8. Wasim Akram
9. Shane Warne
10. Malcolm Marshall
11. Michael Holding
So there we have it: An opening partnership combining the technical beauty of Hutton and the attacking instinct of Sehwag. A middle-order of disciplined run machines. An aggressive, egotistical and fearless bludgeoner in Richards. The most skilful glove-man in the game’s history. A lefty who moved the ball with such destructive brilliance. Wit, nous, intelligence and pure talent embodied within Warne’s ‘tweakers’. And two tame West Indians floating up 70mph half-volleys!
Anyone disagree? Please post your thoughts and comments and I will respond.
Sunday, 26 September 2010
SELECTORS SUFFER ASHES FEVER
Fact: Shahid Afridi has never been dismissed 'LBW' in his test career.
Video (‘uncomfortable bounce’): http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w-f5pfBgpNE
History is plagued by many naive decisions: Paul McCartney’s marriage to Heather Mills, Mike Smith refusing The Beatles a recording contract in 1962, and the 62 occasions when Emile Heskey was selected to represent England; all rank high in a record of human folly. But none more so than the decision to include Chris Tremlett in England’s 16-man touring party for the Ashes. One struggles to fathom how Geoff Miller (chairman of selectors), run out just once in 51 test match innings, could make such an error of judgement.
Tremlett has enjoyed ‘somewhat’ of a resurgent season with Surrey, returning 48 Championship scalps at 20.18. But by no means a remarkable haul. Supporters of Tremlett consistently argue the line ‘uncomfortable bounce’; no doubt a weaker euphemism than asking Malcolm Nash to ‘take a blow’*. But a bowler of 6ft 7inches should be getting explosive, destructive and fiery bounce! If Michael Holding was told he trundled in with ‘uncomfortable bounce’, all hell would break loose!!!
One must also consider the lack of character displayed by Tremlett when pressure is applied. His enduring petulance and pathetic attachment of blame (especially to injuries) seem not to resemble an English bowler hungry for Ashes triumph, but rather a single mother from Peckham in search of a council-flat. Both worrying prospects when examined in the cauldron of an Ashes series Down Under. Indeed, Tremlett returned figures of 0-82 in 2 ODI appearances in England’s last outing in Australia, in 2007.
But clearly the biggest scandal behind Tremlett’s inclusion is the exclusion of Ajmal Shazhad. Of course, the selectors have close to no true experience of Ajmal’s Test credentials. A solitary appearance against Bangladesh this summer, whilst heralding some exceptional reverse swing, was by no means a prolific debut. But it is easy to identify that ‘Ajy’ is bursting with potential. Furthermore, Ajmal’s outstanding enthusiasm along with his superb attitude will not only serve to strengthen his resolve, but will also make him a greater hit in the dressing room than Twitter. Shazhad’s omission is yet again another example of the conservative character of England’s management; reflected in Strauss’ defensive fields and Miller’s politically correct jargon. Before the 2005 Ashes series, Vaughan was presented with a choice between a hard-hitting ego from Natal with no Test experience, and the ever dependable Graham Thorpe (100 Test caps). A risk that paid off?
Many have also queried the selection of Tim Bresnan. On recent form, Bresnan has been as useful as a fart in a jacuzzi. Returning figures of 5-203 in 3 home tests against a weak Bangladeshi outfit, along with a string of indifferent ODI performances. But Bresnan is not the first reserve bowler, that position has foolishly been placed in the hands of Tremlett. With this in mind, one feels ‘Brezza’ can owe his inclusion to his well-renowned ‘banter’ and its harmonising effect on the dressing room. Not a incompetent selection policy when considering the recent success of the England team.
The two other positions up-for-grabs, that of the replacement spinner and the replacement wicket-keeper, have of course found the correct names. Monty Panesar has benefitted from his move to Hove this summer, developing the maturity and nous he has so desperately needed. Monty has also proven himself in Australia where he bagged 8 wickets in Perth (2006). Steve Davies has had an astounding season with Surrey: 1090 first-class runs at 57.36. Hopefully Matt Prior will recognise a genuine threat to his throne and begin to consistently register big-scores.
*The Glamorgan bowler famous for delivering the six deliveries met by six 6s from the bat of Sir Garfield Sobers in 1968,
Video (‘uncomfortable bounce’): http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w-f5pfBgpNE
History is plagued by many naive decisions: Paul McCartney’s marriage to Heather Mills, Mike Smith refusing The Beatles a recording contract in 1962, and the 62 occasions when Emile Heskey was selected to represent England; all rank high in a record of human folly. But none more so than the decision to include Chris Tremlett in England’s 16-man touring party for the Ashes. One struggles to fathom how Geoff Miller (chairman of selectors), run out just once in 51 test match innings, could make such an error of judgement.
Tremlett has enjoyed ‘somewhat’ of a resurgent season with Surrey, returning 48 Championship scalps at 20.18. But by no means a remarkable haul. Supporters of Tremlett consistently argue the line ‘uncomfortable bounce’; no doubt a weaker euphemism than asking Malcolm Nash to ‘take a blow’*. But a bowler of 6ft 7inches should be getting explosive, destructive and fiery bounce! If Michael Holding was told he trundled in with ‘uncomfortable bounce’, all hell would break loose!!!
One must also consider the lack of character displayed by Tremlett when pressure is applied. His enduring petulance and pathetic attachment of blame (especially to injuries) seem not to resemble an English bowler hungry for Ashes triumph, but rather a single mother from Peckham in search of a council-flat. Both worrying prospects when examined in the cauldron of an Ashes series Down Under. Indeed, Tremlett returned figures of 0-82 in 2 ODI appearances in England’s last outing in Australia, in 2007.
But clearly the biggest scandal behind Tremlett’s inclusion is the exclusion of Ajmal Shazhad. Of course, the selectors have close to no true experience of Ajmal’s Test credentials. A solitary appearance against Bangladesh this summer, whilst heralding some exceptional reverse swing, was by no means a prolific debut. But it is easy to identify that ‘Ajy’ is bursting with potential. Furthermore, Ajmal’s outstanding enthusiasm along with his superb attitude will not only serve to strengthen his resolve, but will also make him a greater hit in the dressing room than Twitter. Shazhad’s omission is yet again another example of the conservative character of England’s management; reflected in Strauss’ defensive fields and Miller’s politically correct jargon. Before the 2005 Ashes series, Vaughan was presented with a choice between a hard-hitting ego from Natal with no Test experience, and the ever dependable Graham Thorpe (100 Test caps). A risk that paid off?
Many have also queried the selection of Tim Bresnan. On recent form, Bresnan has been as useful as a fart in a jacuzzi. Returning figures of 5-203 in 3 home tests against a weak Bangladeshi outfit, along with a string of indifferent ODI performances. But Bresnan is not the first reserve bowler, that position has foolishly been placed in the hands of Tremlett. With this in mind, one feels ‘Brezza’ can owe his inclusion to his well-renowned ‘banter’ and its harmonising effect on the dressing room. Not a incompetent selection policy when considering the recent success of the England team.
The two other positions up-for-grabs, that of the replacement spinner and the replacement wicket-keeper, have of course found the correct names. Monty Panesar has benefitted from his move to Hove this summer, developing the maturity and nous he has so desperately needed. Monty has also proven himself in Australia where he bagged 8 wickets in Perth (2006). Steve Davies has had an astounding season with Surrey: 1090 first-class runs at 57.36. Hopefully Matt Prior will recognise a genuine threat to his throne and begin to consistently register big-scores.
*The Glamorgan bowler famous for delivering the six deliveries met by six 6s from the bat of Sir Garfield Sobers in 1968,
Tuesday, 10 August 2010
The Weakening Empire of Test Cricket
Fact: Donald Bradman was never dismissed in the 90s.
Video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aqszcEWi5po
Test cricket is, and will hopefully always remain the pinnacle of the sport, indeed of all sport. The true test of technique, nous and temperament played over the course of five pulsating days of cricket. Nothing on earth, not even sex (and definitely not football!), can provide a man with such intense enjoyment. However, currently there are only 9 cricketing nations with test match credentials. Furthermore, 3 of them are nowhere near competitive enough.
The ICC must don its imperial crown and take firm steps to encourage the expansion of the finest empire on Earth. The most important of which is to prevent a nation’s top players chasing cricket careers elsewhere. There is no doubt that Ireland would have been close to confirming test status had they been able to hold on to the talents of Eoin Morgan, Ed Joyce and Martin McCague. Likewise with the Netherlands, who would possibly be able to demonstrate test match potential if Ryan Ten Doeschate and Dirk Nannes were prevented from pursuing careers with Essex and Australia respectively (Ten Doeschate even playing for Essex against the touring dutch recently this year!). Such an exodus is not exclusive to cricket alone. Indeed, the best rugby talent from the Pacific Islands will always be tempted to represent the All Blacks at international level. The same can of course be said for Football, but I really couldn't care less.
It is worth noting that Zimbabwe are set to return to the test arena in 2011, six years after their latest test appearance. The ICC (in partnership with the ZCU) should make every effort to secure a peaceful and positive transition. However, this can only be achieved through the sensible management of international tours and a concern for the political dimensions of home test matches. But some impressive recent ODI performances (including wins over Sri Lanka and India) and the emergence of talents such as 'Rocket Man' Elton Chigumbura, all promise great success for the future.
But of more distress is the weakening state of 3 test nations: In a similar manner to Kerry Katona’s dwindling career, Bangladesh cricket is going nowhere!! Their test record reads worse than one of Katie Price’s ‘novels’: Played 68, Drawn 6, Won 3 and Lost and incredible 59 matches. Bangladesh are no mugs and can regularly dominate a session of play, especially with the fiery attacking instinct of opening batsman Tamim Iqbal. However, Bangladesh consistently lose wickets in clusters and provide sessions of what can only be described as ‘buffet’ bowling. Until Bangladesh develop the ability (in both body and mind) to remain competitive throughout all 5 days, they will never forcefully compete as a test nation.
On a very personal grievance, the decline of West Indies cricket (in all formats!!!) since the great era of the 1980’s is of particular disappointment to the game. For instance, the most destructive fast bowling attack in the history of cricket (Holding, Roberts, Marshall, Croft, Garner) has been replaced by a motley crew of medium-pacers led by Ravi Rampaul!!! It is like comparing ‘The Stones’ with ‘The Saturdays’!! It is not hard to pin-point the origin of the West Indies’ problems. Attitude! The apathetic and selfish culture within the WI dressing room has allowed for needless contract disputes, player strikes, atrocious fielding and dire performances. Arguably at the centre of this fiasco is the captain Chris Gayle. A very talented player but a dismal skipper. He has already publicly expressed his preference for Twenty20 cricket over the test format. Even returning from IPL duty 24 hours before the start of a test series. And his quick-fire 50s (and out) lack any notion of responsibility or team ethos. Quite frankly, a worse leader since David Brent! However, West Indies cricket is not dead and buried just yet. The fiery potential and temperament of fast bowler Kemar Roach, along with the guile of Sulieman Benn and the passion of Dwayne Bravo, identify that the calypso spirit is still alive within the islands. But these young players need an inspiring captain to nurture their growth. Exactly in the manner by which Clive Lloyd drew the full potential out of the great egos of the 1980’s.
Perhaps the most troubled of all test nations is Pakistan. And of course politics is to blame. Recently the Pakistan Cricket Board has dished out fines, bans and life-bans with alarming ease. Such is the volatility and impulsiveness of the PCB, Pakistan Cricket now seems to comically resemble the ‘Big Brother House’!! Such destructive ruthlessness is sadly a feature of all Pakistani sport. The most recent example occuring at the Hockey World Cup this year, when the entire Pakistan team (coaches and players) were 'forced' to retire from the international arena following an early exit in the tournament. The PCB need to support the team and the coaches. They need to accept the inevitability of a poor performance, and even of the occasional misdemeanour. What they need not do, is jump to the gun quicker than ‘Billy the Kid’. If this is achieved Waqar Younis and his team can focus on unleashing their full potential without constantly looking over their shoulders. They could also benefit from some serious catching practice!! The ICC (in partnership with the Pakistan government) must also strive to secure a return of home test matches to one of the most passionate cricketing nations.
So there we have it. Thoughts please!
Video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aqszcEWi5po
Test cricket is, and will hopefully always remain the pinnacle of the sport, indeed of all sport. The true test of technique, nous and temperament played over the course of five pulsating days of cricket. Nothing on earth, not even sex (and definitely not football!), can provide a man with such intense enjoyment. However, currently there are only 9 cricketing nations with test match credentials. Furthermore, 3 of them are nowhere near competitive enough.
The ICC must don its imperial crown and take firm steps to encourage the expansion of the finest empire on Earth. The most important of which is to prevent a nation’s top players chasing cricket careers elsewhere. There is no doubt that Ireland would have been close to confirming test status had they been able to hold on to the talents of Eoin Morgan, Ed Joyce and Martin McCague. Likewise with the Netherlands, who would possibly be able to demonstrate test match potential if Ryan Ten Doeschate and Dirk Nannes were prevented from pursuing careers with Essex and Australia respectively (Ten Doeschate even playing for Essex against the touring dutch recently this year!). Such an exodus is not exclusive to cricket alone. Indeed, the best rugby talent from the Pacific Islands will always be tempted to represent the All Blacks at international level. The same can of course be said for Football, but I really couldn't care less.
It is worth noting that Zimbabwe are set to return to the test arena in 2011, six years after their latest test appearance. The ICC (in partnership with the ZCU) should make every effort to secure a peaceful and positive transition. However, this can only be achieved through the sensible management of international tours and a concern for the political dimensions of home test matches. But some impressive recent ODI performances (including wins over Sri Lanka and India) and the emergence of talents such as 'Rocket Man' Elton Chigumbura, all promise great success for the future.
But of more distress is the weakening state of 3 test nations: In a similar manner to Kerry Katona’s dwindling career, Bangladesh cricket is going nowhere!! Their test record reads worse than one of Katie Price’s ‘novels’: Played 68, Drawn 6, Won 3 and Lost and incredible 59 matches. Bangladesh are no mugs and can regularly dominate a session of play, especially with the fiery attacking instinct of opening batsman Tamim Iqbal. However, Bangladesh consistently lose wickets in clusters and provide sessions of what can only be described as ‘buffet’ bowling. Until Bangladesh develop the ability (in both body and mind) to remain competitive throughout all 5 days, they will never forcefully compete as a test nation.
On a very personal grievance, the decline of West Indies cricket (in all formats!!!) since the great era of the 1980’s is of particular disappointment to the game. For instance, the most destructive fast bowling attack in the history of cricket (Holding, Roberts, Marshall, Croft, Garner) has been replaced by a motley crew of medium-pacers led by Ravi Rampaul!!! It is like comparing ‘The Stones’ with ‘The Saturdays’!! It is not hard to pin-point the origin of the West Indies’ problems. Attitude! The apathetic and selfish culture within the WI dressing room has allowed for needless contract disputes, player strikes, atrocious fielding and dire performances. Arguably at the centre of this fiasco is the captain Chris Gayle. A very talented player but a dismal skipper. He has already publicly expressed his preference for Twenty20 cricket over the test format. Even returning from IPL duty 24 hours before the start of a test series. And his quick-fire 50s (and out) lack any notion of responsibility or team ethos. Quite frankly, a worse leader since David Brent! However, West Indies cricket is not dead and buried just yet. The fiery potential and temperament of fast bowler Kemar Roach, along with the guile of Sulieman Benn and the passion of Dwayne Bravo, identify that the calypso spirit is still alive within the islands. But these young players need an inspiring captain to nurture their growth. Exactly in the manner by which Clive Lloyd drew the full potential out of the great egos of the 1980’s.
Perhaps the most troubled of all test nations is Pakistan. And of course politics is to blame. Recently the Pakistan Cricket Board has dished out fines, bans and life-bans with alarming ease. Such is the volatility and impulsiveness of the PCB, Pakistan Cricket now seems to comically resemble the ‘Big Brother House’!! Such destructive ruthlessness is sadly a feature of all Pakistani sport. The most recent example occuring at the Hockey World Cup this year, when the entire Pakistan team (coaches and players) were 'forced' to retire from the international arena following an early exit in the tournament. The PCB need to support the team and the coaches. They need to accept the inevitability of a poor performance, and even of the occasional misdemeanour. What they need not do, is jump to the gun quicker than ‘Billy the Kid’. If this is achieved Waqar Younis and his team can focus on unleashing their full potential without constantly looking over their shoulders. They could also benefit from some serious catching practice!! The ICC (in partnership with the Pakistan government) must also strive to secure a return of home test matches to one of the most passionate cricketing nations.
So there we have it. Thoughts please!
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